Families Change
Parent Guide to Separation & Divorce

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How do I tell my children?

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One of the hardest parts of deciding to separate or get a divorce is telling your children. You might feel like waiting to tell your children because you don’t know how to do it. It’s important to be honest with them once you make the decision. The way you handle telling your children will affect how well they are able to deal with the changes in their lives.

Even if you aren’t getting along with your partner, you should both try to agree on how to tell the children. You should think about how you will talk to your children about the divorce or separation. Plan how you will answer their questions. If you are ready to have this talk, it will go better. Your children look to you for guidance, and the way they react to the news will depend on how you tell them.

If you have been fighting or arguing in front of your kids, the news that you are separating might not be a surprise, especially for older children. Your kids might be more surprised if you have kept your problems a secret. No matter what your kids know about any problems you have been having, it is normal for them to be upset when they find out you are splitting up.

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